It is time for a new update. After the shock and joy wore off...reality hit like a ton of bricks with many fears. I went from pure excitement to pure dread. I asked Dan, "What did we do? Can I do this? What were we thinking? Who's idea was this? Why didn't we just stick with dogs?" Anxiety and morning sickness made for a very tough week. I found that I did not want to eat. Food just did not sound good or look good or smell good. I had to force myself to eat. The foodie did not want food! Not only did I not want food but I did not want any sweets. Just the thought made me queezy! The first Monday was filled with doubts, fears, anxiety, morning sickness, and lots of tears. Those hormones definitely kicked in! The rest of the week slowly got better. I had to rest my head regularly because the morning sickness, headache, and tiredness. That first week was one toughie!
Last week was close to the same. I constantly felt ill and tired. My pants were putting a lot of pressure on a specific spot on my torso that was making me even more sick. I used a paperclip to extend my pants and that made a huge difference! Go figure! Monday morning started the ever so lovely puking. Every morning that week, I either puked or dry heaved...so lovely... I would continue to feel extremely ill for the rest of the day and had to force food. I had a mini breakdown on Thursday night because I was worn out, tired, and at my wits end in pain. Dan was a great comforter and let me cry and rest with him. Dan left right after work for a weekend trip in Portland. I was scared to be on my own because Dan is such a huge support. He makes dinner and gets me drinks and takes care of the dogs and takes care of the bunnies and is extremely reassuring! On Friday after work, I stocked up on freezer food so that I could eat regularly whenever I needed to. I actually slept until 10am on Saturday and started to actually feel human. I went to the Vigil Mass, just in case I wasn't feeling up to it on Sunday. After Mass, I ran an errand and passed a restaurant that actually sounded good so I placed a to go order. I got home and ate my whole dinner...and it was good...so good! I actually wanted to eat and it was awesome! I puked on Sunday but felt pretty good the rest of the day so the entire weekend alone was a huge success!
This week so far has been pretty good. Yesterday I actually felt like myself again. I was out of my office cave and chatting with co-workers instead of dieing at my desk. I think I have figured out that there will be good days and bad days. If I get enough sleep and rest, the mornings are so much better. It works better to shower at night. Also, if I eat every two hours, I feel better, too. It's nice to finally figure out some of these tricks so that I can feel more alive and more like myself. The big events of the week include an appointment with the nurse on Thursday and Sprouse-Shannon wedding festivities on Friday and Saturday!
Really what I have learned over the last two weeks is that they should not call it morning sickness, it is all-day-sickness!
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